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The Therapy Sessions
Saturday, October 25, 2003

Idiot Without A Net

Niagara Falls Stunt Was 'Impulsive'

Here's a bet that this jackass had no life....
NIAGARA FALLS, Ontario (AP) -- A man who went over Niagara Falls with only the clothes on his back and survived will be charged with illegally performing a stunt, park police said Tuesday.

Kirk Jones, 40, of Canton, Michigan, is the first person known to have plunged over the falls without safety devices and lived. He could be fined $10,000.

"It was an impulsive one-second thing and in a second and a half I was in the water," Jones said in a telephone interview with WXYZ-TV in Detroit.

"I was in the water for about eight seconds. ... I was immediately enveloped by what seemed like tons of water."

Tons of water? In the biggest waterfall in North America? Who knew?

Family and friends said Jones had been considering the stunt for years -- but more so in recent weeks.

Friends and family should have told Kirk that this was not such a hot idea.

One friend said Jones hoped to make a lot of money from the notoriety....Eric Fronek, 21, also of Canton, said his friend had been talking about possibly going over the falls for weeks.

"No one believed he would actually do it," Fronek said Tuesday. "He said, 'If I go over and I live, I am going to make some money."'

Oh yeah. I can't wait for the book.

Lynda Satelmajer, of Brampton, Ontario, said she and her family watched the man as he entered the river and then went over the falls.

"He seemed a bit edgy, kind of jumping around," she said. "He walked over to where we were standing and he jumped and slid down on his backside and went over the brink.

"It was really freaky, actually. He was smiling."

Yep. No Life.

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