Johnny Dopeyseed

OK. Here's one of those things I've always wondered about...

Many people like to smoke marijuana. In fact they like to smoke marijuana so much that they are promoting clothing made out of hemp.

Yeah right.

Most people, I think, sense that this zeal for hemp comes not from their fondness for scratchy, crappy clothing. They have an ulterior motive: hemp plants are marijuana plants without the THC. In the hippie bong dream, hemp would be growing all over the place. This would confuse law enforcement ("No officer! These plants and grow lights are here because I'm trying to grow a sweater, Dude! I'm clean, honest!")

But why aren't they growing all over the place?

Marijuana is a weed. The young hooligans who loiter in my neighborhood (the infamous "Lee Circle Gang")even refer to it as "weed," or so I'm told.

Marijuana seeds have no THC, so they are no value to hippies. By casting them out of car windows and flinging them into the grass on coutry hikes, the whole country should be bursting with buds by now.

Where is the hippie version of Johnny Appleseed? Or Johnny Stonerseed? Is he too baked to remember to save his seeds?

I can't understand why this hasn't happened.

(For the record, I think we should legalize pot and tax the hell out of it.)
- posted by total @ 5/09/2005 05:35:00 AM .